Keeping it real.....

The sky is gray and rain drops are running down the windows of my sunroom....my safe place, my haven. This day reflects me perfectly at the moment. My attitude is gray and the tears are slowly making their way down my face. I've had a few good days this week but the difficult ones still seem to outnumber them and that makes me sad. I don't want to be this person who is so focused on my every pain and discomfort. I WANT to glorify God, to trust God, to honor God, to bless others, to fulfill the purpose He has for me TODAY. But how do I do that when I'm so focused on myself and this grasping onto who I was just a few short months ago?

Today I remembered the Scripture:

Do not call to mind the former things,

Or ponder things of the past.

Behold, I will do something new,

Now it will spring forth;

Will you not be aware of it?

I will even make a roadway in the wilderness,

Rivers in the desert.           Isaiah 43:18,19

Somehow I need to let go of the person I was before - activities, appearance, ministry - and embrace? the something new God has for me. I am in the wilderness and am searching for the roadway. For if there is no roadway, I don't want to be here. God must have a purpose for me today. I'm in a desert and long to swim in the river, to feel the water rushing over me with cleansing and healing and peace. Yes, Lord, may it be so! Help me to be aware of it!

I've heard that it has taken others weeks to fully recover from the sickness that is making it's rounds in Lancaster County. So I guess I'm on track there. I'm thankful for peaceful nights even when I awaken; and music that turns my heart to praise in the dark hours of the night. I'm thankful for freedom to just BE here in my refuge and have my strength renewed like the eagle's. I'm thankful that I can pray for dear ones in my life who are struggling with many different challenges.....some much worse than mine. Praying for others helps me to have a proper perspective and reminds me that I'm not the only one on a painful journey.

Thinking of this spring rain today also reminded me of an old choir song that I've always loved and it's based on Hosea 6:3:

So let us know, let us press on to know the Lord.

His going forth is as certain as the dawn;

And He will come to us like the rain,

Like the spring rain watering the earth.

So, as I rest here today and listen to the gentle rain, may my heart press on to know Jesus. May I be confident that He will come to me like the gentle spring rain, watering the earth - watering my spirit, soul and body and filling me with new life and strength. May the gentle rain of the Holy Spirit wash over you today bringing life and health and peace. Thank you for your prayers. I am prayng for you with love and appreciation.