The Safe Place

So there's the time when you've just been knocked over by a wave at the ocean. Well, more like tossed in the washing machine for a few seconds. You've been deposited on the shore and are busy wiping the water and seaweed from your face, pushing your hair back in place and making sure the bathing suit is in the right places.....when completely out of nowhere another wave slams into you and sends you for another ungraceful tumble. Arms and legs flailing as you wonder exactly which shore you are going to end up on this time.

Yes, there's a special unpleasantness about this scenario. And even more so when it's a sickness setback. In my last post I said that I had turned a corner from that virus...but I was wrong. Whether it was the fact that I jumped back into my activities, or had a bone treatment (which can cause flu-like symptoms) or I was just given a two day reprieve, it kicked me down again. It has not been fun. Thank you to all who have reached out to me and helped in so many ways. Especially to all for praying. I'd hate to think what these two weeks would have been like without the prayer support.

And so today was a good, fever and headache free day. A day to finally spend time in the Word and journaling. These past weeks have been filled with prayers mixed in with despair and hope; worship and fears; music, lots of music. I've wimpered to God and railed at God and pleaded with God and surrendered to God. I've curled up in my Daddy's lap and rested in His embrace.

I've been doing a lot of thinking about the "Safe Place" or secret place in the Shelter of the Almighty. I want my spirit to dwell there all of the time, listening to the Holy Spirit and living my life from this vantage point. We know that we ARE a spirit, we live in a body and we have a soul. Any of those three can control our life at any given moment. I have a long way to go at understanding this but I'm reading about it and seeking. Will you allow me to share some of my recent thoughts on the matter? This search has obviously come from a place where I need to keep God's perspective in focus, need to be in that place of communion with God to walk these difficult circumstances in peace that passes understanding. To be able to trust God no matter what. We need it all of the time, really, but the need is most deeply felt in these times of weakness.

When we allow our soul to control our lives we can be guided by our mind, will and emotions. All of these are good and needed but the soul should not be running the show! Our emotions are subject to change with the wind and can't be depended upon to always be based on reality. Or we can always be using our mind to try to figure things out (which is just not always possible, people!). Another way to get through life is with our wills.....putting pressure on others to do what we want. This can be done passive aggressively or straight out using words to get the job done (my preffered method). Our soul is NOT made to be the center of our lives.

Our bodies can take center stage all too easily in one way or another. We can be consumed with appearance or weight or athletic ability. Obviously this is not a good solid core to live your life from. I was probably the healthiest person I knew when I got my cancer diagnosis. All the that healthy eating and exercising hasn't given me much support in my moments of sadness.

That leaves the spirit, the inner man, the real you, the you that will live forever. That spirit that dwells inside of us with the Holy Spirit. THAT is our safe place. I'm seeking to live in that place. The place where I know that I know that I'm a beloved child of the King, so loved I can't comprehend it. It's where peace can always be found. Comfort. It's where our hiding place is, where we are surrounded with songs of deliverance. We seek refuge and hide in the shadow of His wings..."until destruction passes by". We learn that HE is our refuge and fortress and we can trust our God. In the shadow of His wings I can sing for joy no matter what is swirling around me. We cling to Him and His right hand upholds. This is no physical place, is not touched by time or circumstances or our strength. We can be in that inner circle with Jesus struggling with our deepest pain. It's an awareness that grows the longer I cultivate this inner life with God.

Lovely thought, eh? But not something obtained without time and effort. I'm striving to build up my inner man by spending time in God's presence....alone time with Him, soaking up His precious words and listening to the Holy Spirit's gentle whispers. It's from this vantage point that I can receive the unconditional love of God. And in receiving, I am able to share that with those in my life. From that vantage point I can say with TobyMac,

 "Hang in there. Everything is going to be alright. Maybe not today or tomorrow but eventually."

So I'd like to ask you to think about your inner man, your spirit. Are you developing it as much as you are your muscles or your brain or your talents? When you are faced with any difficult circumstances those things will not bring you the peace and security to face the future. But a spirit that DWELLS in the shadow of the Almighty will have a rock to stand on.....

He who dwells in the shelter of the most High, will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the LORD, "My refuge and my fortress, my God in whom I trust!" For it is HE who delivers you from the trapper. And from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with His pinions and UNDER HIS WINGS you may seek refuge; His FAITHFULNESS is a shield and a bulwark. 

 Psalm 91 verses

I don't understand this all but I'm growing....want to join me on this search?