Obeying my mother....

My mother told me that I need to write a blog tonight.....and I ALWAYS listen to my mother :-)!!! So here I am.

Yesterday morning I confidently wrote on this site, ALL WILL BE WELL. The blog was posted and the attack began. My concern over the discomfort and pressure in my chest was taking over my thoughts. For the next few hours my emotions were winning the battle of control over my spirit. This is NOT how I want to live. The Holy Spirit lives inside of me. He is in control over my spirit. My spirit leads (or should) my mind, will and emotions. This is my goal. Sometimes it actually happens! Emotions are not bad, but they are not meant to lead us.

I had a bone infusion scheduled and was also going to have a chest xray to give information as to what was actually happening inside of me. During the infusion, my dear nurse navigator, Amy Jo, visited me and listened and encouraged and once again gave me a good perspective on this journey that I'm on. This is a marathon. In this world of quick fixes, in my world of get-er-done successes.....this is completely the opposite. I'm still wrapping my mind around this fact. Perhaps you've experienced this; a defining moment that changes everything....and not always in a way that we choose! But it is our reality and God is good through it all.

I waited today for the report from my xray. Morning came and went. No call. But, unlike yesterday, I was at peace. I was meditating on Deuteronomy 31:8 - a passage my mother shared with me when I first was diagnosed and a friend refered to today:

The LORD is the One who goes ahead of you.

He will be with you.

He will not fail you or forsake you.

Do not fear or be dismayed.

At last the call came from Amy Jo. Her first words were read from Dr. Oyer's report from my xray, "There continues to be improvement". REALLY? THANK YOU, JESUS! What tremendous relief and joy flooded through my spirit AND my emotions :-). And so this evening I am thankful. Thankful for this good report. Thankful for strength to run this marathon. Thankful for the support of family and friends...for YOU who read my simple thoughts on this blog! Thankful for a God who wraps me in His arms when I cry. For a husband who drops his work to come home and pray for me and who brings me Blizzards. For the knowledge that in our journeys, God IS with us always. If you cry out to Him, HE WILL MEET YOU. He will hold your tomorrows....He will hold your hand.

As I wrap this up, this snippet of an old song is running through my mind.....

"Many things about tomorrow I don't seem to understand,

But I know who holds tomorrow,

And I KNOW who holds my hand."